A gate called Beautiful

Acts 3
"A man who was lame from birth was carried and placed every day at the temple gate called Beautiful so that he could beg from those entering through the gate on their way to the temple."

He sits outside the gate called Beautiful, invisable but hoping to be seen,

He sits and begs and waits for help as the religious pass by this man unclean.

From the womb he has been lame and without hope he daily survives,

And he sits by the gate called 'Beautiful' watching the religeous pass him by.

The religious are so busy as the walk pass him on their way to worship God and confirm their dignified place,

The begger contiues to sit at the gate called 'Beautiful' waiting for the day someone shows him grace.

Like this begger's story in Acts chapter three,

Every day people sit at a gate called 'Beautiful' and look for the hope that is found in you and me.

The world passes them by as they sit at the gate praying to be seen,

The world sees their dirt, their mistakes and contiues to walk past the lame and unclean.

But Jesus speaks and says "You are created with a purpose, open your eyes and see-"

"Sitting by a gate called 'Beautiful' won't bring you beauty because it is only found in Me."

Jesus continues "I lift up your face with my hands and silver and gold I do not give"

"My sweet child sitting at the gate 'YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL and MY life I gave so that you can live."

Every day someone is sitting by a gate called 'Beautiful' waiting to be seen,

Will you stop and tell them about life in Christ or continue to walk past the begger and unclean? -Jennifer Phillips

"..At the name of Jesus the beggar's feet and ankles became strong and he jumped up, stood and started to walk. He entered the temple complex walking, leaping and praising God. All the people saw him and they recognized that he was the one who used to sit and beg at the Beautiful Gate of the temple."

My prayer is that God will continue to use us to stop walking past the invisable and that we will see the insivable people of this world leaping as they enter the Beautiful gates of heaven with praise and the world will be amazed that the hand of God overlooks no one and by the blood of Christ EVERY ONE is beautiful. God knows how to treat His bride and his children don't sit by a gate but get to walk through it leaping and shouting the praise of His great name!

When it melts...

As you know Europe has really been hit with a harsh winter and new numbers are reported daily of lives lost to freezing tempatures or like in Bulgaria the dams that recently broke and claimed lives with flood waters. My prayer for our country is that the temperatures will heat gradually and not quickly. With so much snow we could see problems with flooding should the snow melt quicker than the rivers and streams can handle.
The group we work with live right by a small river run off from the mountain. Living by this water gives them supply for drinking, cooking and bathing but I have a concern that living so close can be very dangerous for them should the snow melt quickly and overflow streams and rivers. Above, the pictures taken before the snowfall show us crossing the area I am talking about and a glance at their homes right next to it. Please pray for our country, the homeless who are losing their lives to the temperatures throughout Europe and for the temperatures to be gradual as they increase in heat. No flash floods!

A big smile, a weak heart

We have a little friend who goes by the name of DiDi in our Roma community who needs your prayer. He was born with a heart condition and had surgery as an infant but still needs at least a total of 3 more. Unfortunately he needs to be 100% healthy before he can receive the next surgery and he has struggled to stay healthy. DiDi is 3 years old and wears a huge smile on his face but his heart is weak. You can see him in the above picture sitting in my lap in during our Bible study and also with his mother in the other picture. (pictures used above were given permission to by used on this website by the mother of Didi in order to generate prayer support for his health needs)

On Sunday, the leader of the Roma group informed us that Didi has been unable to breathe well and had grown significantly more ill and asked if Beth and I could drive his mother and him to the hospital. When we arrived to pick them up, we noticed the shade of blue on his face and our hearts were heavy with concern. At the hospital the doctor said that she believed 100% without an x-ray that he had pneumonia and needed to be hospitalized however he would need a hospital that had a cardiology department. Unfortunately they could not help him and referred him to a different hospital. The problem is that Didi's mother had previously sought help from this particular hospital and stated that the hospital they referred us to had threaten to call social services and take away her son if they returned because she lived in a tent and not a home. I can say that I would prefer to see them living in a house somewhere too but that's not the case and since we are in their homes each week I can vouch that their homes are clean and warm on the inside. She lives differently than I do but we love our children just the same and I understood her fear of possibly losing him. We talked over different options and she decided to visit an urgent care center in a different area of town. The doctor there did not X-rays and very quickly diagnosed him with a sore throat and prescribed some medicines. I asked three or four times if his lungs were okay and every time I was told there was no problem with his lungs but only that his throat was swollen and was the cause for the breathing trouble and wet cough. Our heart is heavy tonight for Didi because we don't want an incorrect diagnosis to cause him further complications but also relieved that if it is only a throat infection then we should see our friend with a smile back on his face and healthy. Please pray for our little warrior Didi and for is heart to stay strong until his next surgery. Pray that the sweet hand of our Lord lay across his chest and help him breath tonight and that he would regain his health, especially in these unbelievably cold times across Europe.

Praise God for those who helped us collect some blankets for this sweet group of brothers and sisters in Christ. Praise God that we found three snow suits for three of our smallest kids in the community at a very cheap second hand store. Praise God for the honor we have to call the people of this group our friends and work beside them each week as they learn of the unending love of their Savior. Praise God for placing friends like Justin and Beth in our life to help with every daily task needed in this ministry. Our God is faithful and our God is good!

He Redeems!

Last night I hosted a dinner/play date for a child and his mother from Benjamin's school. I was so excited and nervous. I cooked three different things and then decided spagetti would be best. Unfortunately she nor her child knew what spagetti was and seemed sceptical =) Whoopsie! Thought it was a universal meal.
The children played very well together and Micah and Ben were awesome listeners and followed directions whenever I needed to ask them to do something. My guest was impressed and asked "How do you get them to do that? You ask them one time and they listen to what you say." Then she started tearing up and I saw the feelings of a defeated parent surfacing. I admitted quickly that the behavior she was witnessing was wonderful but not always consistent and neither was my behavior. I told her how the night before I laid in bed crying because I had yelled at Benjamin two times that day and saw how it crushed him. I told her how Micah listens and is very obidient and so I therefore expect perfection from him and do not exhibit patience when he fails to listen. I told her of the behavior charts we use and how effective consistent time out is. But I failed to tell her that all the behavior charts in the world and all the time outs are not the results she is admiring in my house. What she is seeing is God's love and grace in action. She is seeing a family that prays over their decisions with parenting and children who know that God controls their home. How did I fail to mention this?! How did I dare take away from the amazing family life God has given us and instead give credit to a stupid behavior chart?! I felt so dumb and foolish after she left and prayed God would redeem my mistake.
The next morning when I dropped off Benjamin, she walked through the door. I've seen her less than five times in all the mornings I've taken Benjamin so this was not just a chance meeting. She walked out with me and asked if I would like to ride with her and I said yes. She started telling me about how wonderful last night was and asked if we could meet again next week and I quickly said yes. Then for one hour we sat in her car and talked (I guess being late to work is okay). Every question she asked was like God wrote it out and put it in her mouth and He was exalted! Pray for this relationship and for my speech to always be ready to give account for the joy I have.
"I will praise the Lord at all times, His praise will always be on my lips." Psalm 34:1

Pray for Micah

Today was a wonderful day for me as a mama but it was also a day of some mixed emotion. This morning Micah was already running late to catch the bus, but he was running around determined to find his green Bible. "Mom, me and my friends are going to start a Bible club today. I have to find my little green Bible!" I tried so hard to help him find it, as I could see in his face how important this was to him. Finally the threat of the bus leaving him was too serious and so I gave him one of our picture Bibles and he took that instead.
Today Micah got off the bus and immediately began to fill me in on the Bible club's first day. He told me that he opened his Bible and would ask other kids if they would like to read it with him. He said "Mom they laughed at me. One kid stuck his tongue out at me and another boy told me the Bible was stupid. Mom they just don't know how cool it is." I told Micah that we could pray for those kids and he gave me their names and we prayed for them tonight. When Cameron and I got home tonight from the Roma community Micah proudly held out his green Bible and said "Found it!" Micah said "Mom do we have any Bibles in Bulgarian so when they want to read it with me they can have a Bible in Bulgarian?" So he has his little stack of Bibles ready to take to school tomorrow.
Today was a very proud moment for me because, Cameron nor I ever encouraged this with Micah, it is simply something he and his two friends decided needed to happen and he was determined to see it happen. I am proud that at the age of five God is encouraging him to do something that I once did. This is where the mixed feelings come into play. When I was in sixth grade I became a Christian. Because my stepdad was a self proclaimed atheist, he challenged my beliefs constantly. I can honestly say I wouldn't be the Christian I am today without his challenges because they forced me to take my decision to follow Christ seriously. I carried my Bible to school with me every day, not necessarily for others to see it but because I wanted to read it every chance I got. This of course was not a popular idea amongst my peers and one day I found my Bible with a pencil sticking out of it. Someone decided to stab my Bible while I was out of the classroom. =) My senior year I had very clear directions from God to tell my graduating class about Him before school ended. I did NOT want to do this and I would spend a good part of my lunch break shaking in fear and praying in the restroom for God to let me off the hook. Every lunch hour I would go from table to table telling peers about God's love for them. Seven of my peers prayed to follow Christ! One day, my darkest day of high school was when I was sharing about God's love and a bread roll hit me in the back of the head. Soon after, mashed potatoes hit my hair and shortly after that water got thrown at me as I walked by the group of girls that did all of this. I see Micah and I am so proud but my stomach actually turns to knots at the thoughts of what following Christ will mean in his life. I know how bad those girls hurt me during my high school years but I also remember how God was closer than ever in my relationship with Him during that time. Today when Micah told me about the kids who laughed at him, stuck out their tongue and told him what he was doing was stupid I had to take a moment to not immediately want to protect Micah. I have to trust God to take care of Micah just like He took care of me. God never calls us to do something without knowing the details of the job in front of us. Just as we follow Christ and trust Him with our life we must also trust Him with the lives of our children. I don't ever want Micah to be hit with food by his peers like I was and to be picked on day in and day out by their malicious gossip, but I also don't want to deprive him of those moments. It was in those moments of trials that I became strengthened to follow God wherever He called and in whatever I was called to do. So please pray for Micah and his Bible club. Pray that he would not be discouraged by those who will call him names or laugh at him but that he and his two friends would do what God has told them to do. Praise God for the little ears that hear His voice and follow without hesitation!

Oops, Did I say "strong"...HELP ME!

You think I would have learned by now that my own strength and my own abilities will always fail me, but sometimes I feel the need to try it again and be reminded of my complete dependence on God! This weekend was one of those times. A little boy spitting in my face at a play center on Saturday should have been a hint that the weekend may not be as easy as I expected it to be =) But then again, I'm pretty dense. Since I had prepared very early in the week for Sunday's lesson I felt pretty confident that it would be easy and though I thought about spending time with God over needing His help, my actions displayed my over confidence. Sunday began with more children than I had expected and I began to rush to get things in order to help compensate for my lack of preparation. Once in the class room, children were very defiant and some were quite challenging. I remembered my over confidence and I realized it's just me today. At no point this week did I invite God to go before me on Sunday, at no point did I even pray about Sunday and needing His help because in my own confidence and strength I felt like "I got this" and Sunday was quickly letting me know I DID NOT. As with God's gentle nature He allowed me to have it myself as I initially desired. When the children sat down for the story I had difficulty reading it in the Bulgarian yet that week I had practiced it so confidently. The children were restless and few listened. I quickly moved on to the game I had prepared and arguing began between the children because they didn't like the team they were on. I quickly then moved onto the color activity in order to get the kids to sit quietly and calmly. As soon as we sat down and I thought, "finally things are going better" a little 3 year old decided he was a dog and began chewing my markers and growling. I attempted to take the marker from his mouth and he bit my foot and began barking at me. He then moved on and began eating everyone's art work. The calm sitting down turned into children yelling and hitting the dog boy in the head. I had lost complete control. I thought of new games to play, I thought of different activities to do and nothing worked. In my mind I thought "At least the service is only 30 minutes!" But unbeknownst to me, that day there was a guest speaker and children's church would be an hour. I wanted to cry. I felt so foolish to have taken a step in front of God and in my own strength and confidence, think my flesh could ever be strong enough for the work He has called me to do. After the children left, Cameron tried to make me happier and asked me "what do you want to do? I know you don't want to go home and cook, so do you want to go somewhere after church instead?" I thought 'Oh yes, this is perfect.' I will find my joy restored after a cheeseburger and latte from Mc Donalds. We went to Mc Donalds and I ate my cheeseburger and took a drink of my nice warm latte. I felt something in my mouth and thought it was food until I felt a "pop" It was a fly! There was a fly in my latte and it was now in my mouth! I was ready for the day to end! It's comical now but Sunday I wanted to get a tattoo that said "YOU ARE WEAK, NEVER DO THIS AGAIN!" lol, Oh the lessons we learn in the times we step in front of God. I don't think there was a fly in my latte because I didn't pray enough, but I do think that when I live in my own strength a fly in my latte will break me. My joy and my strength is from the Lord, it is not found in my own abilities, my ministry, or a cheeseburger and latte. We are to always be humble before our God and submit to Him daily and in all areas of our life His grace will be sufficient.
"Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will lift you up" James 4:10

May you be encouraged and reminded by my weekend to spend time with God today and follow a Sovereign God whose strength is always sufficient for us. He is gracious enough to allow us to step out in our own strength, only to find we will always need Him =) Guard your heart, your mind and your time and lay them at His feet.

The wrong side...

We had a meeting in Germany last week and decided to take a vacation while we were there. We made our way to Holland to visit the former home of my hero, Corrie Ten Boom. Her book "The Hiding Place" changed my life and understanding of sorrow. After losing our fifth pregnancy, a friend gave me the opportunity to read this book and read about this amazing woman who ended up in a concentration camp for hiding Jews. The thing I always remember from the book is: When Corrie was an old lady sitting in her chair, a woman asked her about life's sorrows and how sorrow could truly turn around and be something beautiful. Corrie sat in a chair and while cross stitching lifted the under side of what she was working on and said "Does this look beautiful to you?" The woman replied "Well not that side. I'm sure it's beautiful on the other side but this side doesn't show the complete picture, just threading." Corrie laid it back in her lap and said "So is the same with life sorrow, you are looking at it from the wrong side. One day we will stand next to Jesus and see the beauty of the picture. Right now you just see the threading." I take that example of her's with me always, treasured in my heart, always reminding myself that I am looking at the picture from the wrong side and one day I will be so blessed to know I was one of those threads that helped make that beautiful picture. Right now in my sweet country of Bulgaria, there are alot of threads. There are scared and hurting people. There is anger and there are angry words. There are alot of threads but I know that My Jesus is able to redeem all things for His glory. May the prayer for Bulgaria be that we can find ways to be part of the picture of beauty that is being weaved together for His glory! Our personal prayer is that we can one day look at the picture from Heaven's side and say that little insignificant piece of string right there is me =) God is an artist, a mighty creator but no one ever stands back and admires the paint jars or the unused threads, but rather the masterpiece! We can make a choice today to be left on the shelf, unused for His glory or be part of the picture. We serve a God that is so awesome to let us be a part of His work!
Please pray for our country and for our family as we work beside the Roma, equipping this people group to desire and train others to be part of the picture for God's glory.
"May God be gracious to us and bless us; look on us with favor so that Your way may be known on earth, Your salvation among all nations." Psalm 67:1-2
And you may be reading this from the other side of the world but I BEG you, do not under estimate the power of prayer! You can be a mighty part of ministry taking place all over Bulgaria by praying for the Christians here who are constantly showing others the love of Christ. Be part of the picture!