Sunday, December 12, 2010

From December to December


It was last December that I was laying in bed crying over the loss of our fifth and last baby. I cried out to God and then my mind started to ponder our work in Bulgaria and the orphanages I would have the opportunity to visit. I immediately began thinking of the babies and children who needed a mother and how I was a mother who longed for another child. It was at this moment that God interrupted my thoughts and demanded my attention. He clearly told me that I would follow Him to Bulgaria with my eyes focused on Him and nothing else. If He added to our family while we were there it would happen while my eyes were focused on Him. He told me to quit trying to fix the broken pieces of my heart with a baby. I cried some more and rededicated my thoughts and focused my eyes on Him alone. The next day at church Pastor Lee told a story about an orphanage in Russia and of some missionaries that helped the orphans recreate the manger scene. They were confused when one of the orphans had two symbols for baby Jesus in the manger. The orphan explained that unlike the wise men who brought gifts for baby Jesus, he had nothing to give. The orphan then explained that Jesus told him that he could get in the manger with Him and if he got in His manger he could be with Him forever. At that very moment God spoke to me and said "Jennifer quit focusing on putting babies in your crib and focus on putting them in My manger. Even if you adopt forty children and put them in your cribs, there are still hundreds of thousands who have not made it into my manger." Oh I still get teary eyed recounting those tender but needed times with God and the focus He gave me!
This week I have had the opportunity and privilege to visit several orphanages around and outside the city of Sofia. It was so sweet reflecting back from last December until now. Last December I could only imagine the orphans that I so longed to work with and this December I was playing with their hair and holding their hands as we exchanged smiles and love. I cannot tell you how badly they need the hope of Christ and what that baby in the manger means for them. I cannot tell you how squeezed my heart was and how overwhelmed I felt at the capacity of needs that overflowed in each situation. One day we may be given direction from God to adopt, but at this moment my eyes are focused on how God wants to move amongst the Roma in those orphanages and put as many of them in His manger as possible. Pray for the orphans around the world who need the hope of Jesus and the Roma who seem to dominate the population inside the orphanages I visited. As you sit around your tree opening presents this year keep in mind those who still need to meet the greatest free gift of all, eternal life and a relationship with Jesus. He is the only one in life who will never leave them nor forsake them! If you attend a church that takes up a Lottie Moon Christmas offering please consider donating to that offering. Lottie Moon is essential in funding and sending missionaries overseas to do the work God has called them to do. Thank you for giving to this offering, it is because of those who give that we are able to be here in Bulgaria!

4 comments:

  1. I love your heart, my friend. Thank you for being brave enough to share painful pieces, and being obedient to how God is going to mend them all back together. I love you!!!

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  2. I remember you telling me this story at FPO, and I teared up reading it again now. Oh Jennifer, I'm SO happy that He has led you and your precious family on this amazing adventure! He's given you a deep well of love in your heart and the amazing ability to lavish it on others, and I know the Roma will be drenched in this love as you live and serve among them. I love y'all and I hope you have a great Christmas! :)

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  3. Sister, what a beautiful testimony. We were lifting you up in prayer during that time and what beauty God allowed you to experience this December in Bulgaria. How awesome! I believe so many of us can heed wisdom from your words and experience- to focus on Him and not what we're trying to make of our own lives or how we think we should mend our broken pieces- beautiful- such truth. thank you

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