A thank you and tears

Today was like any other, I had language class. It was a walk to my bus and metro like any other and like always I was hungry. I was thinking about lunch and I had 10leva in my pocket and this was my lunch allowance for the next two weeks so I was hanging on tight to it. I decided to go home and eat. Like any other day a beggar was on the sidewalk as I made my way to the bus. Unlike any other day I didn't have extra money with me for beggars ONLY my allowance that I didn't want to use! Of course if you know me, you know I couldn't just walk by even though today I really wanted to. I went to a store and fresh baked bread had just been put out! It smelled wonderful and even more than before I was struggling not to just buy it for me! Instead I purchased only one and some water and returned to the lady. Everything about my day was like any other, except the lady was about to turn it all upside down.
God has given me a heart that refuses to overlook people in society that normally get overlooked. I love these people with a passion. With this heart comes a lot of disappointment when you know you just got taken advantage of. When the beggar turns down the food you just bought them and ask for only money or like one guy who told me "Umm I only eat organic" HA! But I will never stand before Christ one day and have Him tell me "I was hungry but you didn't feed me, I was thirsty but you didn't give me a drink, I was the least of these but you didn't offer or do anything unto me" So disappointment or not, taken advantage of or not, I won't pass an opportunity to show love to the least of these.
As I returned to the woman who was dressed nicely and somewhat out of the ordinary looking for a typical beggar, I figured I was about to continue my ordinary day and she would take the food and it wouldn't really matter to her. As I gave her the food she began tearing up and say thank you to me over and over. I kissed her cheeks and hugged her but her tears squeezed my heart. I had a hard time swallowing the guilt of my selfishness that wanted to walk past her and not look back. The guilt of wanting to feed my own hunger and eat the bread I bought her. The guilt of wanting to hold on to money in my pocket and miss the biggest blessing of my day.
Praise be to God who didn't overlook this woman when I wanted to. Praise be to God who released my selfish grip on 10 Leva. Praise be to God that in my life someone always stopped to feed me, yet I sometimes find it inconvenient to show that same blessing to others. Praise be to God that I have the bread of life and I pray that she will one day have it too!